by Rix Quinn At lunch, several of us guys got to talking about who is the best athlete, human or animal. Surprisingly, the world’s greatest may be the spittle bug, who’s jumpier than a pickpocket at a police station. The adult spittle measures only one-fourth inch long. But this guy possesses remarkable leg strength, and […]
by Rix Quinn What’s the most important position on a football team? I vote for the center. Some pay more attention to the quarterback or running backs, but without the center they’d just be standing around. The center starts each play. Although his primary job is to snap the ball to the quarterback, his first […]
by Rix Quinn Sometimes I wonder how our ancient ancestors survived without foods like breakfast cereal and ice cream. But maybe they didn’t realize what they were missing, because pre-historic television commercials got such poor reception. Seriously, consider the paleolithic period, which covers about 2.5 million years. Up until 12,000 years ago, these folks were […]
by Rix Quinn Every day in my high school, homeroom smelled different. Not better, but different. At that moment, we teens were bound together by one goal. We wanted to smell better, and we wanted to smell stronger. This required experimentation. Every morning, I left home as a cornucopia of fragrances. I began to apply […]
by Rix Quinn If you grew up in the 1950s through 1970s, television westerns introduced you to a thankless career. Here’s the job description. You work for a cowboy who travels constantly and appears to have no source of income. You don’t decide how you spend your day. You’ve got no house or apartment. Have […]
by Rix Quinn Remember that old saying “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush?” I thought about this yesterday while chewing fried chicken. I don’t know what other birds are worth, but I had to pay for the chicken. Seriously, the quote goes back to ancient times. Bird hunters reasoned that […]
by Rix Quinn What’s the real meaning of the fairy tale about Goldilocks? To be frank (although Frank is not my name), Goldilocks and the Three Bears is more confusing than a stop sign on a roller coaster track. First, you gotta accept that a bear family owns a fancy two-story deep in the woods. […]
by Rix Quinn As I get older, I try to learn something every day. That’s not always possible, because some days I just watch reruns. I’m not alone in this mission. My friend Lucas spent months trying to read deeper meanings into old nursery rhymes. For instance, “Incy Wincy Spider climbed up the water spout. […]
by Rix Quinn A well-dressed person can go a long way in life. A naked person can’t go nearly as far…especially in snow. That’s because the right garment selection can (1) impress others, (2) display your sense of style and taste, (3) make others think you know lots more than you do. Would you borrow […]
by Rix Quinn Not long ago I saw a survey that said people are more outspoken than they used to be. So last month — accompanied by a recorder, my friend George and his dog Gopher — we conducted our very own poll. Completely on impulse ( Impulse is a street near our house), we […]