I’M JUST CURIOUS: T-shirt sayings and confessions

by Debbie Walker

I was not going to do anymore of the T-shirt sayings, honestly I didn’t think there could be anymore out there. Wrong! A couple of them are my all-time favorites. Hope you find a favorite, so far that seems to have be this one: “Training your wife is like trying to baptize your cat!” Let’s see if any of these make you smile.

Physically I’m here; mentally I’m in a galaxy far away.
It’s a beautiful day. I think I’ll skip my meds and stir things up a bit.
I can’t play stupid with you. You’re too good at it.
Mister Rodgers did not adequately prepare me for the people in my neighborhood.
I had my patience tested, I’m negative.
Whew that was close, almost had to socialize.
Crazy is like diarrhea, you can only hold it in for so long.
Keep talking. I’m diagnosing you.
Once in a while someone amazing comes along. Here I am.
Daddio of the Patio
A little gray hair is a small price to pay for all this wisdom!
75 percent of my brain capacity is wasted on song lyrics.
My Bucket List: 1. Keep Breathing
Pretty sure I’m going to be one of those senior citizens who bites everyone.
PUNK: Professional Uncle No Kids
Fun Fact: Alcohol increases the size of the send button by 86 percent.
Life is too short to waste time matching socks.
Okay, so maybe there are more than a couple of new ones I really appreciated:
Hello, Yes. I’d like a refund on my body… It’s kinda defective and really expensive.
Tomorrow – A mythical land where I get all my stuff done. (Just way too true).
Okay now for my two top favorites!
I’m more confused than a chameleon in a bag of Skittles
*** Go Braless …. It will pull the wrinkles out of your face!***

The response to my column last week, about collections, certainly hit home with a lot of people. Ken, my significant other, also found out he was not alone in questioning the ‘hoarding’ possibility. I did make a reference to my having a lot of interests. So next you will probably find out more than you will need to continue to support Ken.

I have wigs!! Some I really enjoy and wear often. There are many others that I save just for wearing to school in some of the stories I ‘act out’ for the kids or for a holiday like green for St Patrick’s Day, red or pink for Valentine’s Day, etc. Some of those my mom actually bought!

I have junk jewelry, when I buy some new piece of clothing I can usually come home and pull out earrings to match. I have been collecting those for at least 50 years! (Man I am getting OLD). In the past few years I have added watches, rings, and the list goes on. I also buy it cheap to take apart and make something else for gifts. I have been known to buy earrings to paint different colors; I use nail polish for colors!

Books, as I mentioned last week, play a big part in my clutter. Books about fairies, Native American nations, kids’ books, my collection of Farmer’s Almanacs, clothes, and the list goes on, really. I am sure you are getting a clear picture and I am running out of this week’s words.

I’m just curious how much you will confess to collecting. Contact me at dwdaffy@yahoo.com with questions, comments and confessions!

I’M JUST CURIOUS: Thoughts for the year

by Debbie Walker

Once again I got involved with reading a few of my Farmers’ Almanacs. I have ordered some of the older issues because I enjoy them all and the words carry such wisdom. I am going to list these to hopefully give us thoughts on this past year and our future years.

One can complain because rosebushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.

Smiling is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it in one spot.

People with weak arguments have to develop strong voices (I think of politics).

Why do shipments go by car and cargos go by ship? (I love these things!)

You can never make the same mistake twice because the second time you make it, it’s not a mistake, it’s a choice.

You don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to.

The trouble with being a good sport is you have to lose in order to prove it.

An auction is a place where if you aren’t careful, you’ll get something for nodding.

The quickest way to kindle a fire is to rub two opposing opinions together. (yes, I am again thinking politics!)

Compassion has no limit. Kindness has no enemy.

Don’t press your luck, you might pop it!

When you find a stumbling block, use it as a stepping stone.

There is no need to be perfect to inspire others. Let people get inspired by how you deal with your imperfections.

A relaxed mind is a creative mind. (not sure I agree with that one.)

The best way to forget your own problem is to help someone else with his or hers. (we often find ours wasn’t quite as bad as we thought.)

Age is the price of wisdom.

Undertake no more than you can perform (words from 1887, I hope this one sticks with me.)

It is bad manners to be more polite to your neighbor’s wife than to your own (or the rest of your family) words from 1904.

When drink enters, wisdom departs (1886).

Honesty is the best policy. The reason we don’t hear more about it is probably because it has expired. (Teach the policy anyway, that makes you unique.)

Be careful of your thoughts: they may break into words at any time. (1966)

Don’t be too anxious to give your children what you didn’t have, as you might neglect to give them what you did have.

When you point the fingers at others, you are pointing three at yourself! (Politics!)

If you’d like to have some company, just leave your house messy. (unwritten law!)

In diagnosing the illness of society, many are willing to write the prescription, but few are willing to take the medicine.

The past is precious; the future is fantasy; the present is priceless.

The new year lies before you like a spotless track of snow; be careful how you tread on it, for every mark will show.

Live your life as an exclamation(!) not an explanation.

These PHILOSOFACTS are from Farmers’ Almanac from 2017, 2018, 2013 and 2001. Please enjoy their website, FarmersAlmanac.com. I’m just curious if you enjoy the Farmers’ Almanac as much as I do. Please let me know at dwdaffy@yahoo.com. Don’t forget we are online, too. (P.S.: I did make the comments at the end of some.) There is a great New Year headed our way!

I’M JUST CURIOUS: Collecting, or hoarding

by Debbie Walker

It seems an interest is what begins a collection. Collections move onto the best of intentions. It’s a process of getting things from different places and bringing them together. That may be when the term hobby comes into play. You may find the time spent on a hobby outside your occupation brings relaxation to you.

When we moved back to Maine I began with an interest in fairies. There is an apple tree and a boulder out front that I was drawn to. The tree has a portion of the root system above ground. I kept thinking about what a neat place for fairies to live and I could picture my fairies playing around the boulder. It has been a process but that little interest turned into a collection of fairy items and into a hobby of writing my own fairy stories and, yes, I find writing and setting up a fairy village each summer very relaxing.

(My created fairies and their critter friends are outside and inside (taking over) the house. This place became known as Apple Tree Notch, home of the Bailey family of fairies.)

This example in no way represents the amount of collections in this house. There are decorative bird houses, costume jewelry (I take it apart and make other things), books both for the kids at school and ones for resource information of my many interests, etc. Right about now it is okay to start feeling bad for Ken, my significant other. Poor man, it’s not always easy to live with a person of many interests. One day I may try to make a list of all of them. Mr. Neat Freak has done well to adapt.

There are as many reasons, unlimited and changeable, for collecting things as there are collectors.

A woman I knew in Florida collected dolls. No, not the pretty collectible dolls one would normally picture. She would go to thrift stores and find a naked, nasty haired, neglected doll. She would take it home, clean it, repair it when necessary, dress it and fix the hair. Then she would be onto the next one. Other than giving to a few children that had a need, she would keep (collect) them. Her brother explained they were a large migrant working family (with an abusive, alcoholic father). Their father wouldn’t allow toys; there was no room to carry such around the country as they traveled from state to state for each crop season. She is fulfilling her childhood dream of pretty dolls.

I suppose I have to include something about hoarding. I told you of my having many interests and Ken thinks I have entered into hoarding. Hoarding is to collect and hide large amounts (something valuable). I am not hoarding, I’m not hiding a thing! However I am definitely collecting!

People gather all kinds of things for their collections or hobbies. It all starts with their interests. So rather you are a knitter (yarn), seamstress (material), hobbyist for trains and tracks or whatever your interest, I hope your collection brings you relaxation.

I’m just curious what your collections are. I will be waiting at dwdaffy@yahoo.com to hear about your collections and how they started. Thanks for reading.

I’M JUST CURIOUS: Old time remedies

by Debbie Walker

Wow! Guess what! I was reading a Reader’s Digest article by Jen McCaffery and Tina Dovito titled Old Time Doctor Remedies That Work. I love it! It seems the old time docs and grandmothers may have been on the ball after all! In at least the past five years, researchers have done studies on the realities of the old time remedies actually working.

I have to tell you if you decide to try any of these, DON’T do it without first talking to your doctor or pharmacist They can warn you of possible interactions with any of your medications.

I will admit to having a lot of faith in the intuitions of many of our older generations. Read the information and see how you “feel” about what you read.

You can imagine as reading this information such as:

We don’t need expensive skin creams to lighten age spots. You can apply BUTTERMILK to a cotton ball to your age spot for 20 minutes and then rinse off. Bet that upset the beauty product companies!

Blisters are painful. Clean the blister put PETROLEUM JELLY on the sore and keep covered with bandages. The jelly reduces irritating friction.

To ease the pain of canker sores rinse your mouth with Milk of Magnesia or apply it to sores three or four times a day.

Diarrhea: Make Blackberry Tea by boiling one to 2 tablespoons of blackberries in 1-1/2 cups of water for 10 minutes then strain. Drink several cups a day.

Gout: Those who eat about 20 Cheerios every day are less likely to experience flare-ups.

Hiccups: A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down…. Oh wait, wrong one! Right one: It resets your diaphragm to stop spasms.

Indigestion: Fennel are tiny seeds. Chewing a pinch of fennel will help prevent after meal belching.

Insomnia: Valerian helps folks fall asleep. Take one to two teaspoons of Valerian tincture or two Valerian root capsules 30 minutes before bed.

Kidney stones: Lemon juice, at least 4 oz. per day could help prevent those stones.

Nausea: Chew some candied ginger root or sip some ginger ale or tea.

Tooth and gum pain: We always had cloves (clove oil) handy and knew it would help with mouth pain. Mix a few drops with olive oil, swish in your mouth. Spit.

Wounds: Apply honey directly to a wound every 12 to 24 hours and cover with gauze.

Zits: Try tea tree oil, 5 percent tea tree oil gel. I have also read honey is effective as well.

I’m just curious what your family’s old time remedies are. Oh, one more T-shirt saying: This is for Barbara D. Barb is a wordologist (my own word). This is it: “English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough, thought though.” Contact me at dwdaffy@yahoo.com. Don’t forget to share your remedies with me!!!

God bless all the people devastated by the weather attacks and those who are there to assist in their needs. Prayers are needed.

I’M JUST CURIOUS: What do you think?

by Debbie Walker

Do you remember years ago when the scare about eggs came out? We weren’t supposed to eat more than one egg a week. It wasn’t just ‘don’t fry them,’ it was only one a week. NOW according to the American Heart Association we can have one a day!

For years we had paper bags and then …. We moved into plastic bags to save trees (and there has been the collateral damage of the woodsmen and paper mills). Other than some bags made of fabric most of the ones I see seem to have some form of plastic woven in. The plastic bags and products are killing off water creatures, big and small. I am not making light of pollution in any way, just our ‘over use’ society. (Did you ever notice in the grocery stores how just one or two items sometimes have their own bags?)

Plastic, how wonderful. That’s right? We got rid of glass bowls for plastic (somehow an oil byproduct) to use in the microwave (Health? Microwave?). Oops, now the plastic is not good for us so we are encouraged to go back to glass. I imagine the plastic jars and bottles will go back to glass one day or onto the next health problem product.

Marijuana is a product thought once to stunt our brain cells and it was, until recently, illegal here. Now you can buy it and medical byproducts at even the little country corner market. It was thought for a long time when the government figured out how to tax it properly that it would be available to all. I guess they figured it out.

For generations, families were their own biggest resource. Processing their own food and the preparation of such was all important for survival. After more years went by the farms and the gardens disappeared as more of our foods and products became out-sourced. We lost so many farms and local businesses. In recent years we have seen an increase of folks wanting to do things the old ways with new local people learning the old ways sprinkled with new technology. It seems people are willingly going back to the basics in all walks of life.

I guess over time a lot of things have and will continue to change back to the way they were. I do hope that toilet paper is not one of those things. I hope I don’t live long enough to see that one go backwards. I forgot, it can’t. We don’t have the old Sears’s catalogs to leave in our bathrooms anymore!

So what do you think?

I do have new T-shirts to add to the collection of sayings: “Children are Spoiled because No One will spank Grandma!” (Love that one!) AND “Mirror, Mirror on the wall I Am my MOTHER after all.”

I’m just curious if you find odd things humorous like I do? How about if you share some of yours. Contact me at dwdaffy@yahoo.com. I’ll be waiting! Thank you for reading.

I’M JUST CURIOUS: Have you ever wondered…

by Debbie Walker

Have you ever wondered how long different things might last? Well, I found a few listed in an HGTV magazine awhile back. I thought maybe it might hold some interest for you. It’s an odd assortment of subjects listed in an ABC index. Here we go:

Aloe Vera gel – 12 months once it’s been opened. It’s suggested to store it in the fridge.

Bulbs – 10-15 years These bulbs are of the plant variety, not electrical.

Cast Iron pans – Generations (finally something that lasts). Suggested to use warm water and a non-scratch scrub brush.

Deli-meat – Up to 5 days. (Told you it is an odd assortment). Best if kept in meat drawer.

Exterior Paint Job – Up to 10 years preparation, the quality of paint and color play into it.

Fertilizer (dry or liquid) – Forever. If it clumps or crystals break with a trowel.

Hot Water Heater (tank) – up to 12 years, (tankless) up to 15 years. Maintenance is big issue – should be flushed out when heat system gets checkup.

Ice Pops – Up to 18 months. Home made only about three weeks. Store in back of freezer.

Skipped J, K on to L

Laptop – three to five years. That one is funny! I know kids who can kill them off fast. Then you have me who has been using my adult granddaughter’s cast off for over six years!

Mattress – Up to 10 years. If it’s not a pillow top it ought to be rotated two times a year. We’re waking up achy, may be time for a new one. The achy can’t be because of US growing old.

Nut Butter – Up to 6 months. Store opened jars in fridge. Oil separation is normal, if it smells like oil paint, it’s bad.

Skipped O & P

Quinoa – three years. Keep it in cabinet away from heat source. It’s not a grain and any moisture may make it sprout.

Razor Blades – up to six weeks If you shave more than 2 times a week, anything over six weeks you’ll get razor burns and nicks.

Shower Curtain Liner – one year.

Skipped T,U & V

Wood Cutting Board – A lifetime, maybe even a passer-oner.

Skipped X,Y & Z

Okay, on to something else. Have you ever heard of Spoonerism? I hadn’t but I like it! It is an error in speech or a deliberate play on words where letters are switched between two words in a phrase. Examples follow:

Heard at a wedding: “It is kisstomary to cuss the bride.”

Heard a nervous college student on an official visit: “Is the bean dizzy?”

Heard from many a mother: “Now you go upstairs and shake a tower!”

Heard from aggravated fan: “I can’t believe they scored a Dutch town!”

I’m just curious how many times I have done the word swap! Thanks for reading! Contact me at dwdaffy@yahoo.com. Don’t forget this winter when you can’t get out to get a paper, we are online!

I’M JUST CURIOUS: The meaning of “Unity”

by Debbie Walker

One of the definitions for the word Unity is ‘harmony.’ If the town fathers named the town of Unity for its harmony I’ll bet they never pictured this past weekend. The Common Ground Country Fair is the ultimate of proof of unity (harmony) in their little town.

Once a year, the third weekend of September, MOFGA sponsors the Common Ground Country Fair, in Unity. MOFGA is the Maine Organic Farmers and Gardener’s Association (Website is www.mofga.org/the-fair/schedule). If you weren’t able to attend and are curious that website is full of information.

It seems a lot of people look forward to the experience of the fair. In fact last year it is said that 60,000 people from all over the country were on those grounds. If you look up their website your questions as to ‘why’ will be answered. The content is amazing.

There is education of value to many different ages and interests. There are demonstrations to peak a curiosity into a possible serious interest. There are many activities for children of all ages. There are foods you may never have experienced before. There are also entertainers.

Unity is a small town surrounded by small towns. Sixty thousand people affect each one of these towns. It looks to me like this fair may be a little inconvenient, three days a year, for residents due to traffic, however it is great for the merchants of Unity. The surrounding town’s merchants must also enjoy the extra business brought their way with them doing little to no marketing for such. Today I saw something else.

On a day I was out riding without my yard sale/thrift store shopping buddies (and I was on my way to a meeting) I couldn’t believe all the yard sales set up in private yards and parking lots! Just think, all that traffic and they didn’t have to advertise. If I think of it next year I will try to remind everyone of the fun to be had at the Common Ground Country Fair or in surrounding towns!

I’m just curious about one activity. Who would and why would anyone want to be part of the Harry S Truman Manure Pitch contest? (It was listed on their site!)

In the spirit of the weekend I am adding these little jokes I found in Blum’s Farmer’s and Planter’s Almanac:

Gardening is cheaper than therapy……………and you get tomatoes.
A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows.
How well is your garden going to grow? ………. Only thyme will tell.
Why did the gardener quit? ………… His celery wasn’t high enough.
Why didn’t anyone laugh at the gardener’s jokes? …………..They were too corny.
What’s the gardener’s favorite sport? …………..Squash
Why was the gardener so busy over the weekend? …….. He had a really long Honeydew list.
Garden Wisdom: ……. The best way to garden is to put on a wide brimmed straw hat and some old clothes. And with a hoe in one hand and a cold drink in the other, tell somebody else where to dig.

OK, OK, now I am just curious if I will be allowed to write again! Thanks for reading, don’t forget about our website and please send me any questions or comments to dwdaffy@yahoo.com.

I’M JUST CURIOUS: More T-shirt messages

by Debbie Walker

I couldn’t resist doing it again!! I got new catalogs with message t-shirts and felt the need to share! Hope they give you a chuckle or two:

People who wonder if the glass is half empty or half full miss the point. The glass is refillable!

If you think I’m crazy you should meet my sister! (Couldn’t resist that one!)

I’m not short. I’m built low to the ground for speed and accuracy. (Believe me it has to be easier in a fall!) can’t believe how old people my age are! (OOPS!)

I meant to behave but there were too many options. (ask the teacher I work with, she’d say that is me!)

I call my fashion style “Clothes that still fit!” (How True!)

When I get tired of shopping I sit down and try on shoes! (I have better luck trying on the boxes!)

Sometimes I wonder what happened to people who have asked me for directions. (I’d have to know where “I” am!!)

Being cremated is my last hope for a Smoking Hot Body!! (Now my secret is out)

When you’re happy and you know it Thank Your Meds!

I acted my age once. It was boring! (Haven’t done it since!)

I run like a girl, try to keep up. (Not a problem here!)

Forget the glass slipper, this princess wears running shoes!

Sawdust is Man Glitter.

I am a happy-go-lucky ray of friggin’ sunshine!

Wooden Spoon Survivor (We didn’t have one when I was growing up,Yardstick!)

I have a daughter. I also have a gun, a shovel and an alibi.

Stress balls really work when you shove them down someone’s throat!

Someday I’m going to eye roll myself into another dimension!

In order to insult me I must first value your opinion. Nice try though!

I should be given an award for keeping my mouth shut when there is much left to be said!

When women get to a certain age they start accumulating cats, this is known as the many paws! (What do you think of that one Laurie!)

A little gray hair is a small price to pay for all this wisdom!

Patience is a virtue. It’s just not one of mine!

I don’t have gray hair. I have wisdom highlights!

Don’t grow up! It’s a trap!

Life is short – smile while you still have teeth!

Does running late count as Exercise?

Instead of a sign that says, “Do Not Disturb,” I need one that says, “Already Disturbed, Proceed with Caution.”

My patience dies faster than my phone battery.

You’re never too old for Nappy Time, (Right, Mom!)

Some days the supply of curse words is insufficient to meet my demands!

Not to brag but I can forget what I’m doing while I am doing it!

I’m returning your nose dear! I found it in my business,

I’m everything you dreamt of but with a belly!

Yes, I’m a nurse. NO I don’t want to look at it!

Life is too short to waste time matching socks!

I’m just curious if any of these make you laugh at yourself! I know I did. Questions and comments please send to dwdaffy@yahoo.com. Don’t forget we are on line also. Thanks for reading!

I’M JUST CURIOUS: Farmers’ Almanac fan

by Debbie Walker

Just about anyone who listens to TV News must have heard the Farmer’s Almanac came out last week. I ordered a 2015 and a 2019 and they were delivered in just a couple of days. Yehaw! Can you tell I am a fan?

We all know by now that I get excited about some strange things. So you won’t be surprised when I tell you I couldn’t wait to get a hold of my copies of THE almanac! My excitement was not so I could figure out if it would snow on my birthday in January! My excitement was to read the included articles, and I have not been disappointed!

If an almanac was on the table right in front of me, for many years I wouldn’t have even picked it up. I’ve never been overly interested in the weather. It is what it is. I don’t plant a garden so I wasn’t interested what you plant during what moon. I just couldn’t see why I would be interested in the publication.

I am sure Patsy must have been behind my finally picking one up to look at. OMG! They got my interest! and have kept my interest for a couple of years now. As I said I also ordered 2015. I plan to buy more of the older ones, especially if I run out of my own ideas for columns.

Almost forgot to mention the on-line newsletter I get every month and the little specialty notes now and then. It can be said they know how to keep my interest.

This latest edition now has 20 hot pink book marked pages with titles such as: The Language of Flowers, Keep Those Pests Out Naturally, Air Conditioning (?) and A Man Who Could Make It Rain, just to name a few. You can also check them on-line at Farmer’s Almanac.com.

Do you have any magazines that keep holding your interest, issue after issue? How about sending me the name and why it continues to please you.

I enjoy some of the old sayings I read in the 2019 issue about weather:

Cold is the night when the stars shine bright. — If a circle forms ‘round the moon, ‘twill rain or snow soon. – When the dew is on the grass, rain will never come to pass. – Trout jump high, when rain is nigh. And when sounds travel far and wide, a stormy day will betide.

I also got a chuckle from reading The Language of Flowers. I think you could write a letter using the names of flowers, their colors and their description as code words:

Baby’s Breath: Innocence Carnation (white): Innocence, faithfulness, sweet and lovely, pure love, Good luck.

Iris: Wisdom, your friendship means so much to me.

Rose (white): Innocence, purity, secrecy, or friendship.

So put a bouquet of those flowers together for a gift for a newborn and you have wished them a wonderful future. OR maybe a gift for your first love. (More some other day!!)

I’m just curious what ideas you might come up with. Please, send questions or comments to dwdaffy@yahoo.com. Thank you for reading and don’t forget we do have a website!

I’M JUST CURIOUS: Christmas is coming!

by Debbie Walker

Time passes and with that Christmas will arrive on December 25 in about 117 days. My thought is just to give you a heads up and with that some ideas.

The little ones are easy to buy for. It doesn’t take much to make them happy. Beware though, they will unwrap, throw the paper, look at the gift for a second or two then throw that too and on to the next. Later they will go back to it.

It’s hard to know the interests of children in this day and age of everything computers.

My pet project idea is next: Do they have their own books or magazines? Promote reading whenever you can. Even long distance you can read to them. Get two books, mail them one and you keep one. They will look forward to your calls. Eventually they could read to you. Children can also tell stories from pictures.

When my grandkids got a little older I started giving them Experiences. An experience can be a new movie coming out, maybe a children’s museum. (These will work for other gift giving occasions as well.) Maybe a membership to a “Y” where they can play ball or swim would be good. Maybe you can take them to some workshops at The Home Depot.

When they become teens the Experience still works well. You can also use gift cards. If you live near them you could have a shopping trip and lunch. What about a weekend for two at a motel, especially one that has a gym and restaurant. I would suggest you both have limited cell phone and internet use. The idea is you are giving them yourself, your time and interest. Priceless!

Your adult children’s gifts, you are on your own. The best I can tell you is to listen to anything they may mention they need or babysit and send them to dinner or a movie. How about a cleaner to do the kitchen and bathrooms or yardman for a day?

If you are lucky enough to have an elder in your life, of course, they would appreciate your time. If you live in their area you might take them to a movie and lunch. If they could use some help you could always hire a cleaner or yardman for them, too. You can also have someone clean their windows. You can buy gift certificates for hair or even for car maintenance. Listen, really listen to them.

Women – Do not disappoint yourself again. I learned, finally, to be very specific about my list to the husband/significant other. I have been known to bring home what I wanted and put it in front of Ken and said, “Look what you got me,” so far he has been relieved and grateful AND I am not aggravated or hurt. They are not like our female friends who understand hints. They don’t seem to have that gene!

I am just curious what ideas you may have. Questions and comments, please. Contact me at dwdaffy@yahoo.com and don’t forget we are also on line. We have archives, too!